.invictus.

"Out of the night that covers me, black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul. In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud. Under the bludgeoninga of chance my head is bloody, but unbowed. Beyond this place of wrath and tears looms but the horror of the shade, and yet the menace of the years finds, shall find, me unafraid. It matters not how strait the gate, how charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul."

this poem holds a lot of meaning to me. it describes my frame of mind. i have been caught in the rapids many of times but I refuse to be pulled under the water without a fight. no! i am not saying i dont go under though. sometimes the pull is just too strong, or from time to time maybe im just too weak, or drawn into the whirlwind of temptation. it is my choice and in my will power to swim to shore no matter how tough the current. beat and battered may be what it takes to come out of the high tides.... damaged... yes! but lessons will be tucked under my belt. take shots if you must. poke and point and speak about how you would swim in my lane but with a different technique but all that matters is how i do it. i think you should try to stay afloat though, before giving me advice on how my tendencies to fall short of my potential make obstacles that may not have came about if i swam at a different pace. for every obstacle that arises wether i put myself into it or it has just been thrown in my direction. i will overcome it and take the lesson i learned as it is. i cant be sour and i cant be salty. i can only say that i have tried the best of my abilities. so when im sipping margaritas chilling in the sand when all is said and done. im going to see you still doggy paddling in the water and shout "maybe you should have been worried about your own current as it was served then always telling me what i can do to be better in my rough rapids.”